Here is the thing, North Korea has long been involved in a nuclear program.  The real purpose for that program was to create a problem for its neighbors and Western powers (mainly the U.S.) that might allow for incentives (food) to be given as compensation for its tearing down that very program.  Meaning, the ruse here was a little game of looming disaster.  But, the reality is that this has gone on for years and has not really been a moot point.  Japan and South Korea called for intervention, but everybody knew North Korea was desperate.  They made it clear they were willing to dismantle as long as the price was right.  It was their sort of backwards way of propping up their failing Communist Regime for another few years.  The seemingly out of nowhere announcement on North Korea’s change of heart comes amidst aggressive Israeli military rhetoric, continued Iranian defiance, and swiftly spiking oil prices.  However, what the world did not seem to notice when days ago, North Korea disclosed its Plutonium Stockpile, and President Bush lifted some of its sanctions and decided to take the Northies off the dubious list of state sponsors of terrorism, that the real play here was to show Iran that it too could be so “fortunate.”  The Bush administration’s dream would be to have Iran begrudgingly agree to give up its current Nuclear enrichment program and come to the bargaining table on a number of key issues.

I want you to look up at the woman.  Her name is Izabella Scorupco.  You may know her from her role as a Bond girl in Goldeneye.  If it were not for her and her… assests, Cougar Club would have gotten only one star(*).  This should help explain what the ratings on the Movie Reviews mean. 

0 stars - If you watch this film after reading this review, go to hell!  (example: Play It to the Bone)

1/2 star - This film got distributed by somebody?  Jesus!  If I hear the name of this film, I swear…  (example:  Gator Bait)

* - Disappointing piece of horse crap.  Who writes this shit?  (example:  Hard Target)

* 1/2 - There must’ve been some distractingly good looking chic for this film to deserve a *, so it got one.  (example:  Cougar Club)

** - There was potential for something here, but it fell flat on its face.  Waste a minute on this, you’re a fool.  (example:  The Kingdom)

** 1/2 - Almost bearable.  If it comes on TV & you can’t fall asleep, it’s acceptable to let this bore you to sleep.  (example:  Every Which Way But Loose)

*** - This really had potential.  I was hoping that this was going to be a great movie, but… it was just good.  Good like a meatloaf, when you were expecting steak.  (example:  The Devil’s Own)

*** 1/2 - I really liked this movie, but it just didn’t have that something… the pistassa… the zzzzigggittyyy… to take it to the next level.  If you like movies in this genre, then you should check it out, matinee of course.  (example:  Catch Me If You Can)

**** - Go see this as soon as you can.  It is definitely worth a primetime viewing and it might just be remembered fondly 10 years from now.  (example:  Casino Royale)

**** 1/2 - Classic, oscar-worthy, and probably one of the 5 best films this year.  Good like filet when you were expecting meatloaf.  (example:  There Will Be Blood)

***** - PISTASSA!  Ok, ok, if you don’t see this one, there’s likely some reason, like you’re blind and deaf!  (example:  Raiders of the Lost Ark)  

Movie Reviews so far:

WALL·E

Wanted

Hellboy

The Incredible Hulk

Veterans to the show saw this coming: The two-part season finale.

Yes, I knew coming into tonight that this season would not end just yet. The final two contestants — Petrozza, our boy, and Christina — have too much to accomplish to pack it in to a one-hour episode.

So, being the smart little directors they are, the people running the show extend the season finale for all its worth, and hopefully they are making some money because I would love to see another season (though I am not sure how many restaurants Gordon Ramsay can oversee, I mean he has to stop at some point right?!?).

Of course there always is Kitchen Nightmares to fill the Ramsay void left in our hearts while our favorite reality cooking show is off the air. Sorry, Top Chef, but Hell’s Kitchen is much, much more entertaining, even if you guys do have better talents.

Time for a little recap of tonight’s episode, the first part of the season finale.

First, as is tradition, highlights of season four were shown, tracing the finalists steps up to this point in the show. It was nice to rehash all of the drama that occured in season four. What was your favorite moment of season four?

Then the chefs were told they each get to design half the restaurant in their own style, and create a signature menu for their half of the restaurant. Christina seemed pretty confident in her menu, while Petrozza struggled to come up with ideas. He did, in the end, put together a menu that seemed to garnish some praise.

The chefs were wisked away to New York City for the challenge. Christina, winner of nine challenges in season four (a Hell’s Kitchen record), came up one vote short of making it 10 wins this season. Petrozza finally got over the hump and won a challenge, and I was happy to see it. The clincher was the final vote, with the score tied 2 - 2, was cast by the guy who will be the winner’s boss in London. Petrozza 1, Christina 0.

Finally, the chefs headed back to Los Angeles to pick teams. I was hoping Petrozza would thwart Christina’s hopes of getting Corey on her team, but alas he went with Bobby for the first pick (his reward for winning the challenge was first pick of the chefs). Along with Bobby, Petrozza ended up with Ben and a yet-to-be-named chef, either Matt or Jen (I kinda hope Jen, I think she is better in the kitchen. Hopefully she can listen for once.).

Christina got Corey and LouRoss, and will the last man or woman standing when we find out next week.

Stay tuned!

This article from comes to us by the lovely Adrienne So, who writes for Wired magazine.

I’ll do a FJM style observation of parts of the article that I thought were, uhm, interesting, but you really should check it out for yourself. Some of the comments are funny as well. Hit the jump for the good stuff..

“As a woman who loves sports, I’ve always found the concept of breasts bothersome. If all goes according to plan, they will fulfill their intended function for about three of the 70 years that I have them. The rest of the time, they alternate between getting in my way and embarrassing me. They are a favorite target of Frisbees and soccer balls. Finding sports bras is a chore. Shirts don’t fit.”

Wow. This first paragraph is solid gold, strictly from a male’s point of view.. I’m sure there are women out there who have difficult days, but come on “Shirts don’t fit.” Really? (sheepishly) Um can I have your number Miss(?) So….

“And these are just the physical discomforts. I am still tortured by the memory of three cousins standing in a circle around me, at the impressionable age of 10, mocking my early development and telling me that I was going to be the Asian Dolly Parton. Fortunately, that never happened, but the possibility haunted my late childhood.”

Some people (Hef) would say that it was unfortunate that you didn’t become an “Asian Dolly Parton,” I however, like you just the way you are….

“Then one day recently I had an idea. As I rode public transportation to the office, my messenger bag slung uncomfortably across my chest, I thought, “Why not put the girls to work?” Human-powered devices are showing up everywhere, from Rotterdam’s sustainable dance floor to human-powered gyms in Hong Kong. The time seemed perfect—perhaps even overdue!—for a bra that could harness the untapped power of breast motion.”

“Putting the girls to work” I wonder how many men have asked their significant other if they would do this.. you know, for them..

Skipping ahead we come to my personal favorite paragraph which states:

“Lawson explained that breasts move on three different axes: from side to side, front to back, and up and down. The most motion is generated on the vertical axis. Naturally, the bigger the breast, the more momentum it generates. “Let’s face it—if you’re a double-A marathoner, you’re probably not going to get that iPod up and running,” Lawson said. Measurements compiled by Lawson and her colleagues show that a D-cup in a low-support bra can travel as much as 35 inches up and down (35 inches!) during exercise, while a B-cup in a high-support bra barely moves an inch.”

WHOA! 35 inches??? are you kidding? If there are 12 inches in a foot, then 35 inches is equal to a little over 2.9 feet… that’s almost 1 yard! Granted it’s not all in one direction, think of it as an arc 3 feet long-so a woman’s D-cup breast size could theoretically move ~1.5 feet in any direction. Also I love how they mention that marathon runners with small breasts won’t be able to generate enough power to run an ipod… so how many “gigawatts” are we talking about here? Well according to Apple’s product info: the ipod power supply outputs 12 Volts and 1.0 Amps, which if my memory of physics is correct equals 12 VAs or watts (P=VI) it’s easy to get that kind of power from a wall outlet, but the article only mentions actual power output of the materials that are talked about twice: “A square meter of fiber produces about 80 milliwatts of power, which is enough to run a small device like a cell phone.” (8th paragraph) and again in reference to a “Lightning Pack” (sounds safe): “The Lightning Pack uses a rotary generator… which produces up to 7 watts of energy…” Hmm still not quite there…

The author ends the piece by saying she is going to “start looking at her breasts in a different light.”

You know I think I will too…

(Update: added picture of Hilary Swank, then I wondered how many watts she would generate)

In keeping with what seems to be a developing style on this blog, I’ve decided to list seven behaviors which should be avoided at all costs. To be fair, I’ve tried to include a few examples of why these decisions are not the best way of doing things. Still I feel as though I am more than qualified to discuss the “worst practices” that one can do as I have been guilty of my fair share of mistakes, some of which show up below…

1. Do not believe everything that you breathe read.

The January 1988 issue of Cosmopolitan Magazine included an article written by doctor Robert E. Gould that was meant to educate the magazine’s female readers of the dangers of AIDS. Unfortunately Gould, a psychiatrist, proclaimed that there was ‘no danger’ of contracting AIDS from having ordinary sexual intercourse. In other words, “Inserting an unprotected penis into any vagina would “guarantee” that neither partner could give the other the disease, it was “only” transmitted by inserting an unprotected penis anywhere else.” This ludicrous view was examined by Paula A. Treichler who went into more detail on the subsequent reaction to the article and it’s ultimate impact on the perception of AIDS in America.

2. Do not drink RAW milk. EVER!

One more reason, as if you didn’t have enough already…

3. Do not think that you’re off the hook just because they can’t find the body.

4. Do not drunk dial someone and leave a message, or if you must (and you also happen to appear on television) do not use the words clubfoot, amputee, or “Bell’s Palsy”

5. Do not forget to remove the videotape you used to capture those super awesome “Star Wars” moves instead of leaving it behind to be found, uploaded and mocked forever..
Bonus clip (my favorite): “SWK: The Clone Wars”

6. Do not mess with the Graduate Management Admission Council when it comes to stealing questions on their GMAT test for prospective MBA students. They will end up owning you and your hard drive that contains information on the students who used the service.

7. Do not believe everything that you read….

8. Finally, this article from MSNBC listing 10 lessons from “The Office” that you shouldn’t learn.

9. Don’t believe everything that you read Never write a post that lists things you shouldn’t do…

One thing you should do is comment on the posts, especially if you hated it, disagreed with it, or just think the author is a moron…. this is an open forum, and all viewpoints are welcome*

One last thing, if you fail to heed anything above make sure you DO NOT click this link…I warned you….

*We (the royal we) may not always agree, but then again we’ve been wrong before….

Masterful!  WALL·E is the most endearing and likely enduring characters of PIXAR’s recent magic.  Brought to the brink of tears and the convulsions of laughter and gripped by the visual beauty, the experience was beyond anything I had expected.  

I truely thought this was some sort of remake of Short Circuit, but of course, it was not (although many traits of Johnny-5 are similar).  This was an original story, both timely and timeless, and full of unforgettable moments.  Though light on the dialogue, especially earlier in the film, it produced a wonderful comic medium of visual humor, reminiscent of silent films.  This has of course always been PIXAR’s forte (see every pre-PIXAR movie short ever made).  The ability to give human emotions and breathe more life into a CGI’ed version of a robot than 99% of actors can muster into their best performances, should be lauded by critics and audiences far and wide.  It is all in the eyes. 

The plot of a love stricken robot, stuck on an isolated planet proves PIXAR has not lost the magic, as many have claimed, since their masterpiece, Toy Story (it was just put on hold).  If I were atop the creative ladder at PIXAR, I would be patting myself on the back and then realizing it might be another decade before we can come up with anything half this good.  I will not endeavor to give away any of the plot and I recommend taking the first oppurtunity to get hold of a ticket for this brilliant movie.  A love story, a pet roach and a trash compacting robot have helped create easily the best movie of the summer. 

Rating: ***** (out of five)

Yet again, I was not sure what to expect from this film.  The previews looked interesting, but who is to know from one minute of cut scenes.  Barnes & Noble had a copy of the compilation of comic books the movie is based on and I had glanced at a few pages.  I realized that the woman Angelina Jolie’s character was portraying was black in the comic book.  Other than that, I gained no real insight. 

Wanted started out quick and did not ease off the pace.  Although there were some excellent moments of dialogue and pause from the hyper-energetic action, the movie was frenetic for most of its runtime.   Employing action sequences that were reminiscent the Matrix, there was an onslaught of visual eye candy.  A scene in the latter part of the movie on a train in mountains in Europe is a memorable.

Actually a lot of the film reminded me of themes from the Matrix.  There was the element of hero/savior archetype.  A character who is living a seemingly normal and pointless life is thrust into a position of saving the world sheerly by his birthrite.  This film, of course, strays from storyline of the world of vegetable-humans living in a simulated environment.   

Instead it focuses on the world of fate dealing assassins with extraodinary fighting abilities.   From the first person point of view with the star as the narrator, we are presented with an intimate look into James McAvoy’s character.   McAvoy has proven he is to be placed in the top ranks of today’s young actors.  He is versatile, capable of humor, and can pull of an American accent.  Unless he pulls a Colin Farrell (Alexander), McAvoy’s movie are going to be blockbusters for a very long time. 

Angelina did a fine job playing a hardcore, tattooed, badass chic with a penchant for acrobatics.  Her super slender body belies the fact that she recently bore a child in Africa.  Morgan Freeman is, well, Morgan Freeman.  His performances never fail to hit the mark.  He plays a godfather like figure, who deals out fate’s commands reading pieces of fabric from an oracle loom.   Terence Stamp, although only in a few minutes of the film, leaves and indelible mark. 

Towards the end of the film, there were some start and stops that were jerky and left me expecting an ending and then continuing on to its fairly predictable, though not weak, finish.  It is not a must see, but it will certainly make a large number of young men lie in bed thinking about when their number will be called to join the ranks of the assassin weavers.

Rating: ***½ (out of five)

Pretty Perfect

Surfing is, in my opinion, the most peaceful, exhilirating, and meditative sport in the world.  When you are surfing, you are tasked with trying to be one with the element of water.  Unlike land, this medium is in constant motion.  The waves come in sets, whose waves may vary in size.  The size of the waves in consecutive sets can vary fairly significantly in size, resulting in a one word cry, “OUTSIDE!!”, which, depending on the size of the waves that day, can make you crap your pants in a flash.  That word outside is letting you know that there is a big ass wave coming, and it is going to break further out in the ocean than where you are sitting, and if you don’t paddle fast enough to get out to sea beyond where it will break, you will face a succession of waves crashing on your head, and leaving you feeling helpless and hopeful that your board will stay within your reach.  That word outside makes for another very exhilirating part of surfing, that being when you paddle so hard and feel like you don’t have an ounce more to give and you paddle up the face of the wave and make it beyond the crest just before it breaks and sends you spinning underwater, and when you get beyond the wave, the winds blowing from the land (on a good day) send the spray from the lip of the wave showering over you.  At this point I typically lay my head on the board in thanks.  I’m not fearing for my life, it just isn’t very pleasant to be trapped underwater and to be completely at the mercy of the ocean.  Then it is back to sitting on your board, scanning the ocean for the next set once again.  It is the perfect balance of hard work, fear and adrenaline, and complete exhiliration when you finally start riding waves.  There is no feeling quite like surfing, being powered along the surface of the water by mother nature’s force is truly inexplicable.  So where do these beautiful works of art come from?  And why must all surfers spend their entire lives searching for their perfect wave?

Waves are generated by wind.  (Except in the case of Tsunamis whereby the waves are caused due to displacement of water as a result of the sea floor shifting in some manner).  But when you are surfing, you don’t want wind blowing towards the shore.  Sounds counterintuitive, I know.   The wind that sends waves to California will often times blow in the middle of nowhere far off in the south pacific.  The stronger the winds and the longer it blows, the greater the swell (waves) created.  That swell will then travel thousands of miles until it hits a coastline and makes some surfers very happy.  Waves can also be created by winds blowing closer to shore, but these waves are not as well formed, or spaced out as the previous type.  So surfers want a swell coming from far away.  And to make those waves as beautiful as possible, surfers want what we call “off-shore” winds.  This term simply means that the wind is blowing from the land out to sea.  This results in the surface of the waves being smoothed out, giving us what could be deemed perfect conditions.  If you have a nice swell from afar, but the winds are “onshore”, the waves will become crumbly, losing their form, and making for less favorable conditions.  Long story short….we want a nice swell with some moderate offshore winds. 

Achieving the conditions of the perfect wave is much more complex than that; unfortunately.  There are several factors that come into play, including the countours of the ocean floor at the break, the distance between the continental shelf and the beach, and a few other things that i won’t bore you with.  Fortunately there are professional wave forecasters so you can know which beach to go to and at what time to increase your odds of scoring some nice waves.

Surfing is practiced the world over, surpassed only by soccer in geographical capacity.  I love to browse http://www.wannasurf.com/spot/index.html  It is essentially an atlas of thousands of surf spots on almost every coastline in the world.  It includes waves being surfed in such places as Alaska, Canada, Norway, Oman, and Russia.  The basic rule is, if there is a coastline, people are surfing.  There are many surfers in Americas Great Lakes.  Surfing is huge in all of the European countries bordering the Atlantic. 

If you want to learn more about waves, wave forecasting, or the ocean, or to see some beautiful photos of waves and islands around the world, check out http://magicseaweed.com/ 

I have been drunk, half-naked and barefoot in New Orleans’ French Quarter, but that’s another story.  Today, it is decided:  Sazerac is the official drink of New Orleans, Louisiana.  No, not just in name, it is written in the law.  Ask the Louisiana House of Representatives. 

I cannot lie, in all my galavanting in the Crescent City, I have never tried this world famous drink.  It is one of the oldest cocktails around, created before the Civil War.  It employs both absinthe and the distinct Peychaud’s bitters in its creation.  Truely, it is only a concoction of a place as wonderfully creative as New Orleans.  And, possibly, New Orleans may be the only city with enough flamboyance and history to justify having an official drink. 

How is it made? 

1 teaspoon of simple syrup (or 1 sugar cube or 1 teaspoon of granulated sugar)
4 dashes Peychaud’s bitters
1 small dash Angostura bitters (optional; it helps open the flavors, but hardcore traditionalists may leave it out).
2 ounces rye whiskey.
1/2 teaspoon absinthe, or Herbsaint (a New Orleans brand of anise liqueur)
Strip of lemon peel  

The traditional method: Pack a 3-1/2 ounce old fashioned glass with ice. In a cocktail shaker, moisten the sugar cube with just enough water to saturate it, then crush. Blend with the whiskey and bitters. Add a few cubes of ice and stir to chill. Discard the ice from the first glass and pour in the Herbsaint. Coat the inside of the entire glass, pouring out the excess. Strain the whiskey into the Herbsaint coated glass. Twist the lemon peel over the glass so that the lemon oil cascades into the drink, then rub the peel over the rim of the glass; do not put the twist in the drink. Or, as Stanley Clisby Arthur says, “Do not commit the sacrilege of dropping the peel into the drink.”

My preferred method: Always use a nice big rocks or Old-Fashioned glass for this drink. Wes and I have managed to slowly and painstakingly acquire a set of eight heavy-bottomed Old Fashioned glasses from the old Roosevelt Hotel in New Orleans, emblazoned with the hotel’s name and the word “SAZERAC” in large letters. We’ve become very fond of these glasses, as you can imagine!

I also recommend the use of a prepared simple syrup (1-1/2 parts sugar to 1 part water) for this and most other cocktails involving sugar that don’t involve muddling. I don’t like adding granulated or lump sugar to a drink unless I’m muddling, because it never quite dissolves completely. In simple syrup the sugar is already dissolved, so there’s no chance of serving a gritty drink to your guests. You may additionally substitute Pernod or any other pastis for the Herbsaint; however, I find that the flavor of Herbsaint is far superior to that of Pernod, so it’s worth your while to seek it out. Actually, it’s worth your while to get a bottle of good absinthe, as it’s easy enough nowadays.

Add the absinthe or Herbsaint to the glass, then swirl it around to coat the entire sides and bottom of the glass. Discard the excess, although if you enjoy a bit more of the flavor of the absinthe or Herbsaint you may wish to leave a small amount of it in the bottom. Remember that the flavor of the absinthe should be there, but in the background — it should not dominate. In a cocktail shaker (I use the glass portion of my Boston shaker), add four or five small ice cubes, then add the sugar syrup, whiskey and bitters. Stir gently for about 30 seconds (and don’t shake it — you don’t want a frothy Sazerac) or until the drink is cold, then strain into the Herbsaint-coated glass. Twist lemon peel over the drink, and try to watch carefully to make sure a cascade of tiny lemon oil droplets actually strike the surface of the drink; this is one of my favorite parts of the preparation ritual. Rub the twist over the rim of the glass, then add as garnish. (No, I’m not a slavish adherent to S. C. Arthur’s admonitions; I’ll do this drink in a very acceptably traditional manner, with my own tastes taken into account.)

Sit back, relax and enjoy the greatest cocktail in the world. (Sorry, Martini.)

(Note:  the above is stolen from- gumbopages.com)

On my next trip to NOLA, I will be enjoying one of these cocktails rather than the cliché Hurricane or Hand Grenade. 

“Bourbon, no ice, please.”

“Two Sazeracs.  Where’s your sense of adventure James?  This is New Orleans, relax.”

Can you guess the movie quotations from above, without the help of Google?

Is milk a panacea?  Milk is not usually a hot topic of conversation.  Do not get me wrong, there have been great bets in college to drink a gallon in an hour.  There was that time the milk smelled so bad, I threw out everything in the fridge.  Oh, and that night I poured milk all over her…  All that aside, milk is usually a bland and creamy delicious part of the day I just do not feel the need to discuss, but apparently all that has changed.

Milk is the new drug of choice for a select group of unorthodox health nuts.  What is at stake:  raw milk.  Illegal altogether in most states, legal for pets in some, and only for sale on location at farms in some others, people want it and they want it now.  There is a craze going on in places where groups want raw, unpasteurized milk sold in stores for its nutritional value.  Some research has been done on the benefits of raw milk, but there are a whole host of possible illnesses that can be contracted from raw milk.  An article in the Boston Globe really gets thorough with the discussion, if you want more information on the topic. 

The short and dirty of it:  raw milk contains certain good bacteria that could be very beneficial, I repeat, could be beneficial to the development of a stronger immune system, especially in young children.  The dangers include bad bacteria, listeria, salmonella, and E. coli among others.  But, these dangers rarely occur in clean healthy milking facilities.  The problem:  Most big milking farms are not clean.  Quality control is not easy in a big dairy farm, especially since 1920’s when pasteurization became widespread.  Just read what current raw milk dairy farmer thinks about it: 

Rick Vreeland is in the perfect position to explain the differences between a big dairy farm and a small one. At Freedom Hill Farm, they’ve gone from nine to 22 cows, but he used to own a dairy farm with 2,000 cows. He says he wouldn’t have downed the milk from his old operation.

Crazy as it might be, I am down for some raw milk.  My grandfather cared for a milking cow when he was child and drank it fresh from the teet.  He claims there is nothing quite like it and all the milkrazies agree.  My mission:  find raw milk and try it asap.  Here’s where I start:  Real Milk